Friday, April 24, 2009

I'm going to lunch tomorrow...but I don't know where...

Here's a traveling tip for you when flying. Always shave your armpits. Okay, let me correct myself. Here's a traveling tip for the ladies when flying. If you do forget, I hope you're not unfortunate enough to be wearing a tank top with a hoodie. Cuz when you go through security you're going to have to take that hoodie off. Male security cards seem to think they're jackets...and I just don't agree. It's a hoodie. It's part of my outfit, not outerware. But, what ever, you're going to have to take it off. You might think you're safe because you can just leave your arms down for those few moments you're without it. And, you might be wrong. Because if they make you go through the special security air blowing thingy you will have to lift your arms. That's awesome. Lifting your arms for ten seconds while everyone else going through security is staring at you. And your pits.

Here's another traveling tip for you. Well, for those of you who travel on I-465 in Indy. If you're driving on 465 and you suddenly come upon a group of cars (otherwise known as a wolfpack...there's a drivers ed term for you) that are going the speed limit, 55MPH, slow the hell down. There's a 99% chance they are doing so because there is a police car nearby. Don't be the jackass that has to try to weave through the traffic riding the butt of the car in front of you to display your impatience. We're all impatient. We're also smarter than you.

Here's a home remodeling tip for you...before you select a new bathroom floor go to all of the stores first. Don't go buy one, arrange for an install, and then come back an hour later to return it. Not that I've done that, I'm just letting you know to go see all of your options first. It's the smart thing to do. Otherwise you might feel foolish returning said bathroom floor. Maybe. Then again, I have a friend who once returned a house, so anything will seem minor to that.

Cheers!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

My eighth move in thirteen years....

So...I've packed all of my food (the non-cold non-frozen food of course). I figured since I've packed all of my pots and pans it was useless any way (ha...like I USED pots and pans to prepare food). I stopped at Kroger's last night because I needed a breakfast food that could go in the car with me. I opted for PopTarts and cake. The cake wasn't for the car, the cake was because I wanted cake. And...yes, I'm aware it's still Lent, and I gave up sweets, and therefore I shouldn't be eating either of those things, but I received my Girl Scout cookies from Lynn, and that was it. I failed. Again. Any way, I went to the self check out at Kroger's since I only had two items (really I didn't want the cashier to judge my horrible eating habits...I would have had to grab a can of corn to feel better and I couldn't do that since all of the food is packed). At Kroger they have these machines that sometimes will print out coupons while your receipt is printing. Usually they are for something you bought. Yesterday mine was for Lean Cuisine. Thanks, Kroger's, I'm already aware.

I was waiting for Marc to get dressed for work the other day. He appears in the brown suit that is his new uniform and is covered in cat hair. He comments that he didn't know where it came from since he came home, took it off, and laid it out for the next day (it came from my sofa, where he had sat the night before...before going home to lay it out for the next day...). He then commented that he wished he had a hook to hang it up with. A hook on the wall where he could just hang it up and it would be ready for the next day, cat hair and wrinkle free. I was very excited to let him know that there already was such a hook, right there in his own house...an amazing hook that would allow him to hang that suit up every day, keeping it cat hair free...
Cheers!

Monday, March 2, 2009

I want a new bed...

Canceling credits cards is an almost impossible task. I don't mean that I find it difficult to let go of them, I mean that calling and actually getting them canceled is a challenge. I have had credit cards that I didn't use for years, and, I kept them not because of fear that I might need them, but because I absolutely hate calling to cancel them. I think that some of the companies must have in their training book the steps to wear you down so you eventually give up and just keep the card so that you can get off of the phone. American Express was by far the worst. They had a clever scheme where the original person you got on the phone (you know, after you went through the thirteen step voice prompted menu) wasn't able to close the account for you. Even though you told the voice prompt computer that's what you wanted to do. They would then keep you on the phone talking about the values of the card while you "waited" for the specialist to join or while you "waited" for the computer to process the request. This exchange from years ago scarred me, and I procrastinated on getting rid of other cards. Until today. Today I learned the values of my cards, the cash back rewards I would be missing out on, the low interest rate, the check for cash they could send me right away...and on and on and on...but, I succeeded, they are canceled and shredded and it is done. I thought it would be a simpler process today since I read yesterday that both Citibank and American Express were actually paying some people to cancel their accounts, I assumed that would mean they would be happy to get rid of any others as well. And I was wrong. Well, except for JCPenney, they didn't really give a crap.

I decided on giving up sweets/desserts for Lent. So far so good. Of course, I realized ahead of time that this decision ALWAYS coincides with the arrival of Girl Scout cookies and that my Thin Mints would have to go straight to the freezer to taunt me. This year stashing them at Marc's house so that I won't be tempted won't even be an option...soon enough I'll be following them there.

I have a love/hate relationship with Angie's List. I had the subscription a while back, and when I went to reinstate it, I was informed I would have to pay the "one time processing fee" again. The frustration I felt over that should be obvious. They made me so angry I just didn't reinstate it. I emailed their customer support with my frustration, and they didn't really care. I then sent a sarcastic email letting them know that I didn't think "one time processing fee" was the correct name for the fee since that wasn't an accurate description and suggested a few other names for them..."fee you'll pay once and then might have to pay again in the future", etc. They responded to me with a polite email saying they would take my suggestions into consideration and if enough people suggested that they would do so. I am a fan of the polite response to the crappy/rude comment. There's really nothing that can be said in response when that happens. Now, Awesome Man has subscribed to Angie's List so that we can find a contractor. Apparently, they remembered me and my crappy emails. I received a bag of M&Ms from them in the mail as a thank-you gift for referring Marc. Once again, a polite response, but I really think they knew about Lent and that's why they sent them so that they arrived the day after it started. I bet you think you got me there, Angie's List, but I might take you up on your polite offer that if I didn't like plain M&Ms I could request a bag of Peanut. Ha. Keep sending them biotches.

Cheeres!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Have you seen Lobbie...?

I'm trying to figure out what to give up for Lent this year. First off, I'm not Catholic, not have I ever went to a church that actually participated in Lent, but for the past ten plus years I've given something up. The past couple of years I've failed, and I need to do better this year. I've given up sweets, carbonated beverages, Coke and similar sodas, red meat...not all at the same time, of course. For me, carbonated beverages was the most difficult. Although I did succeed, I'm not feeling up to that challenge this year. I'm addicted to Diet Coke, and the year I opted to do that I worked as a waitress. It was like torture to pour Cokes for other people and not be able to have one myself. Sort of like being a crack dealer but trying to kick the habbit. And, although one would think eventually the desire for Coke would just go away, it didn't. Apparently, Diet Coke is like smoking to me...you sometimes hear some smokers who have quit say that they could just start again like they never stopped, that's how Coke was. I think I have a law suit against Coca-Cola...there isn't a warning on their can that it's addictive, that if I quit drinking it I will suffer from caffeine withdrawl headaches. I wasn't warned, and because of that I need 12 million dollars. But, back to Lent...I was contemplating giving up games...online, computer and video...but I think I'm going to go for desserts. And, I'm going to actually make it this year.

I actually feel like I really just need to get myself together, in essence. I used to walk four miles a day. Now, I sit on my ass eighteen hours a day. Well, probably not, but it certainly seems like it. For all of you who think it would be awesome to have an office job and work from home, let me tell you, there are some negatives to this. I don't have to walk ANY WHERE. I sit at my desk, the printer/copier/fax is right beside me. The bathroom is ten feet away. The kitchen is practically as close. I walk NO WHERE. Unless, of course, I'm out on appointments, but that doesn't require THAT much walking either. And, to get there, I'm sitting in my car, sometimes for hours (Thursday it was over seven...). I need to get motivated to walk, to go outside (which would be a heck of a lot easier if it were not so freaking cold). I need to get my house organized and clean. Actually, the house cleaning task might be a little easier than it seems because:

I'M GOING TO BE MOVING SOON.

In case you were unaware, we're still working on renovations to Marc's house. The original plan was to renovate a bedroom, a bathroom and the kitchen and then I would move in with him. Then, we would start on an addition. Because this has taken soooooooo long, there's a change of plan. The bedroom is done with the exception of the closet which needs the shelving hung (the MOST important part of the WHOLE ROOM). The bathroom wil hopefully be began and finished this week. Of course, if the bedroom was any indication of the speed of progress, it will take four weeks. I'm going to move in after it's finished instead of waiting on the kitchen. We're speaking to contractors again about the addition which now includes the kitchen. This makes me incredibly happy because I cannot really express how ready I am to get out of this apartment.

My lease ended last July, and since we thought the renovations would be a fairly quick process I opted to go month to month instead of signing a new lease. Now, they raise my rent about every three months. I think it would have been more economical to sign the lease and just break it. Besides the obvious reasons (renting is like throwing money away, I have to be quiet, I hate sharing walls with others, I hate sharing a parking lot with others), there is a new very motivating reason.

I have new neighbors below me.

And they stink.

One would not think that would be an issue, but it is. It is when the smell from their apartment creeps into mine. I know it's coming through the vents because for the few days it was warm last week and I had the heater off and the windows cracked the smell disappeared. As soon as the furnace was on again, the smell returned. It's probably creeping up through the floor as well. All I know is that I can't stand it...it's like stale cigarette smoke and something else, which I cannot describe. Well, I take that back, I can describe it. BAD. STANK. NASTY. GROSS. I do not want to leave my house smelling like that, and I have a feeling as the smell penetrates my clothes that's exactly what's going to happen. So, if I'm hanging out with you and I stink that's why.

Cheers!

Saturday, January 31, 2009

What ever is decided, the kitchen better have a wall for Speedy...

So...does anyone know anyone who has one really fat left arm and a normal sized right arm that would like some shirts? Because I have a feeling when my cast comes off on Wednesday I'm going to have several shirts and sweaters that will fit in that category. So...calling all people with a fat left arm, I might have some clothes for you.

Monday I was talking to Awesome Man on the phone. The weather was bad here, it was sleeting, and tons of snow was expected. He was deciding if he wanted to come over or not or just stay in because the weather was nasty with a forecast of more nasty on the way. He eventually decided he just wanted to stay in and not risk the roads. We talked for a few more minutes, and I'm not sure what lead to this, but it then came out that he was currently DRIVING around town, talking about how much he wanted to stay IN. THAT made perfect sense.

Tomorrow I am off for Philadelphia. The City of Brotherly Love. I hate leaving on Sundays, I hate being gone two nights, and I hate going to Philadelphia. In my opinion, it's the city of homeless people and dirty streets. Obviously, I haven't been to the good part of town yet. Sorry to offend anyone who loves Philly, but I haven't found anything good about it yet. Except maybe the Liberty Bell, but I haven't seen it in person to really say so (nor have I had a true Philly Cheese Steak...which is odd, because I do love the rip offs). MapQuest, Google, Rand McNally and Yahoo have ALL failed at getting me out of the downtown area to get back to the airport multiple times. This usually results in my coming close to tears because of fear of missing my flight and being stuck there for yet another day. And, then we I finally get near the airport unlike any other normal city, a gas station to fill up my rental car tank is no where to be found. Not one near the restaurants and hotels...oh no, that would be foolish. The closest one is in this tiny little "town" about a mile away where you can't pump your own gas...instead this 90 year old man comes out to do it for you. Which, I'll admit, if I had tons of time and it was freezing cold I would be all for...but on every occassion I've been there I just wanted to get gas and go, not wait on him to walk out, fill my tank, walk back in with my credit card, walk back out with my slip to sign...and that's assuming he doesn't have another customer. Oy. The only good thing about Philly, or rather the outskirts of Philly is this: http://www.kingofprussiamall.com/ which I've read is the second biggest mall in America. This trip not only do I get to visit Philly, I also get to visit Harrisburg. Harrisburg offers two things I absolutely love...they have a super small airport and they're super close to Hershey, PA. The super small airport means no stupid shuttles, no long lines and fast security check. The proximity to Hershey, PA means fresh chocolate...and let me tell you, if you've ever tasted a fresh Hershey bar you will no longer want the stale shit they sell on the shelves else where. Obviously, I need more culture or I wouldn't be hating on Philly because of some ghetto looking streets and I wouldn't be so excited about Harrisburg just because of Hershey bars. Maybe some time, when my ultimate goal while visiting these places isn't to get home quicker I'll check out the historic stuff. Until then, I'll just complain.

Cheers!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Unicorns are just like horses...only they have a horn...

So...I get to go to Green Bay, WI tomorrow, the perfect Winter get away. I know you're all envious, wishing that you could take a trip to WI in January as well, imagining the fun in your heads right now...try not to be too jealous. As if Winter in Wisconsin isn't enough fun, I get to go to meetings for three days and share a room with a practical stranger. Practical stranger because we shared a room last year, and we've spoken about twice through out the year in between. So, I guess in my world where I never see my coworkers, she and I are close. I did just speak to her a while ago, and she told me the best news I've heard all week....it's snowing in Detroit. I got all excited and went to check out the weather on weather.com, because snow in Detroit tomorrow is what I've been hoping for since I booked my ticket. Since I have a connection in Detroit maybe I won't have to go. But, alas, it isn't snowing THAT much...flights haven't been canceled, and the chance of delays is low. Hopefully the snow picks up the pace early tomorrow afternoon. Knowing my luck I'll probably get to Detroit and be stuck there, which would be worse than actually making it to Green Bay.

While I'm gone, the kitties will be going to stay with Marc, which I'm sure they're all equally excited about. Or would be if the kitties understood that they were going. Sweet little Sasha has a respiratory infection and is taking medicine twice a day. So...guess what that means? Shoving medicine down her throat is a treat. Those of you who have met her understand. She's a kitty that you cannot pick up, if you do, she will growl, hiss, bite and kick. If you pet her too long or in a way she does not like she will growl, hiss, bite and kick. If you look at her wrong she will growl, hiss, bite and kick. And, I'm really not exaggerating. Marc has been practicing with the medicine...and doing really well, he still has all of his fingers and no blood has been shed.

Believe it or not, this is no more...
It had gotten quite a bit worse, and then one morning they were all gone. The sidewalk was clear. I was confused...why would my neighbor suddenly clean them all up? Did the Indy Star actually come do it for him? I now believe I've figured out the answer. It appears that my recluse of a neighbor has a friend. And by friend I mean girlfriend or boyfriend. I'm not sure which, it's just speculation after all since I don't even know his name. Yeah, I'm just that friendly...but seriously, if your neighbor left the newspaper piling up on the shared porch for months how friendly would you be? All I do know is he's been having a visitor...and he's spent a lot more time not at home lately. Yeah, I'm that into what's up with my neighbors...when you work from home, you notice things, give me a break. I just wish I could see my freak of a neighbor with his new friend and make a comment about the newspaper clean up...his new significant other should know just what a lazy ass weirdo they're getting involved with. I bet they met on the internet, and we all know you only met freaks that way.

I got my hair cut yesterday, something long over do. It was finally growing out, which I was happy about, but it needed trimmed, and best of all...a haircut would mean that someone would wash my hair for me. To fully understand that, tomorrow try to wash your hair with one hand. It's not fun. And, it's not attractive for the left side of one's head to look greasy because apparently the shampoo missed a chunk of hair. The experience ended up not being everything I was hoping for...as we were walking back to the sinks someone informed us that there wasn't any hot water. And, they were speaking the truth. It wasn't like it was just barely warm, it was frigid. I guess that's what days of 0 temperatures will do. I'm sure my stylist loved the fact that I did still want my hair washed. The appointment sort of went downhill from there. Apparently, there was a misunderstanding about exactly what I wanted done with my hair...I asked for the front of my hair to be cut like hers, instead the back of my head looks like hers and the front looks like it did before. Only everything is shorter, a lot shorter, way shorter than I wanted it to be. So much for it finally growing out.

Cheers!

Friday, January 9, 2009

Someone already has a black marc...

In search of a stackable washer and dryer for next to nothing in cost, I joined FreeCycle. In case you don't know what that is, Freecycle is a group/organization (I'm not sure how to classify it...) that promotes recycling of objects. Meaning that if you have something you no longer want you can post it to the Freecycle board and hopefully someone will want it and then you give it to them. It has to be completely free...no trades, no charging...and usually you have to go get it. I know that the washer/dryer is a long shot, but a friend of mine has gotten appliances for homes that her husband is flipping before, so I figured it couldn't hurt to check. I accidently signed up to receive the emails of the items, and my inbox now has 379 messages. There are all sorts of random things listed...beds, books, clothes, lawnmower...it's like a virtual garage sale, only everything is free and you can't see it before hand. Along with the listing of what you have to give, people can also post their wants. Sometimes people have realistic dreams...baby clothes in a certain size, a VCR, puzzles...okay, you might actually get these things. Then, there are the dillusional folks who seem like their wishes are a little out there, IMO at least....a CAR, and not just any car, but a running car...a laptop...rims for their car...are you kidding me? Sure, it could happen...but I'm going to guess the chances are slim. And, with the exception of the rims, I saw multiple posts for cars and laptops. So good luck to them, I guess, I'm sort of torn between wishing them luck and wanting to call them greedy bastards. Some of the wishes are completely stupid, I think at least...someone is after a long phone cord. Seriously? You're willing to drive across town for a phone cord? How about you head over to WalMart and spend $5, or better yet, if you're going to ask for that, go all out and ask for a cordless phone. But, what do I know...maybe some kind soul practically next door just found a long phone cord and wasn't sure what to do with it.

I just returned home from a lovely trip to Detroit. The Motor City. I was told twice I should visit the Ford Museum and I finally figured out that it's probably a car museum. Duh. This was my first trip to the brand new Indy airport...I wasn't there long enough to comment on a lot...but, my only real observances are that they have a ton of shopping, which is great, because the terminal I was always stuck in had absolutely nothing to look at besides Subway, a tiny bookstore and a convenience store. The security line was SLOOOOOOOOW. It wasn't a long line, there were probably five people in front of me, and it took quite a while to get through. Oddly, they pulled me to the side to test my cast in Indy (I'm not sure what for...), but in Detroit, nothing...I just went through. Guess they weren't worried about what ever Indy was looking for. The only other observance I have is that the new moving sidewalks (yes...Indy has finally caught up with every other airport in the world and has moving sidewalks for the lazy) were annoying. They had a recording that would constantly repeart "Warning, the moving sidewalk is about to end" that was so loud you could hear it while you were sitting waiting for your flight to board. Every ten seconds, over and over and over again...if I worked there I would have went insane and poked something into my eardrum as I frantically searched for the mechanism creating the recording. For the first time NWA didn't piss me off...they actually helped to get me off of stand-by and into a seat for an earlier flight. Oddly enough though, just as the woman was doing this for me, the gal next to her was helping someone else who wanted the exact same thing and she told him the flight was overbooked. What ever. At least I was on the good end of the exchange.
Cheers!